The Baxter.

Every once in a while, you find something that so defines you. Your experiences. Your thoughts. Your ideas. Your life.

For me, THIS is that movie:

^^^^ My new hobby. ^^^^

I've been battling this whole "professional musician" thing for a while now. It's a weird concept when it comes to playing in a church setting.

Mainly because the argument can go both ways. I've been trying to wrap my head around it for quite some time now. A year-and-a-half to be exact. The first weekend that I lived in Minneapolis, I got a phone call. "Hey Matt, this is 'so-and-so' from 'so-and-so' church... I need a bassist tomorrow morning, and someone recommended you. We'll pay you $100 for your time."

My first thought was: "Sweet... an easy $100."

I've been playing at random churches ever since then. Some more frequently than others. Granted, it's FANTASTIC getting paid for doing something that I love. However, I've realized that I enjoy it less and less. Some days, worship seems more like a "job" than something I truly enjoy. I've been noticing mostly in the last few months.

Tonight was it. I was playing at a church, and I realized that I didn't even enjoy it. I just wanted to "git-r-done" and get out. I've started playing for all the wrong reasons. I've turned into something that I don't necessarily like. I'm "that guy."

Crap.

So, I'm taking a break for a while. Granted, I'll play off the dates that I'm scheduled at various places; but I think I need to take a little bit of a break... get on track... get my heart in the right place.

Umm... the end?

-?-

So, I've started getting up at 6:30 in the morning. On a regular basis. I actually like it.

This morning, I was gearing up to do some devotions. I opened up my iTunes and decided to make a playlist of some good "worship" music. I put a lot of effort into it. Shoot, there was even some MuteMath in the mix. About ten minutes later I stopped for a second and looked at what I was doing. Did it really matter what was playing? Did I even need music? Nope.

I played at a church last night. The Creative Arts/Music Associate is one of my favorite people. We didn't do worship. We did "song time." That's what it really is, isn't it? Granted, it is much more than that; but you get the idea... call it what it is.

For the record, I ended up listening to The Glorious Unseen. I bought their album because iTunes recommended it to me. It's amazing. Touché iTunes... touché.

I decided I'm going to start leading a little "worship" here and there. It's something I've wanted/felt called to do for quite some time now. I'm a wuss. I don't sing well. I don't play guitar well; but... I'm finally doing it. I'm pretty gosh-darn excited.


The end.

How He Loves.

Quite possibly the most annointed I, VI, V, IV progression ever.

...awesome.